It's over and I'm already moved on.

21.6.10

Admiring him since July 2008. Kena reject habis-habisan sebab dia kena ugut dengan ex-boyf. Couple on 14th February 2009. 1st clash on my birthday, I mintak putus sebab misunderstanding. Dia lagi percaya cakap entah number sesat mana entah, saying that I dah pernah ringan-ringan dengan ex-boyf 2007. Dia ajak couple balik 2 days after that, tolak. 14th August 2009, 2nd time couple. He apologised so much and I forgave him to start a new chapter. Nahh, broke up on 5th November 2009, he cheated on me. Knew after a month, me so stupid. Jangan ingat lepas clash, diam jek. Kena sound dengan girlf dia, bukan sorang tapi 2. Padahal dia yang text I dulu, I jugak jadi mangsa keadaan. 2010, dia ajak my bestf couple but she rejected him kerana mengenangkan I. Then dia ada skandal dngan akak Form 4. Heboh dah, and me jadi mangsa keadaan lagi. Tiap kali jumpa dengan his scandal and his ex-girlf yang sound I last year, memang kena saiko habis. Pandang macam nak telan orang, apa lah salah I pada diorang? End of May, tetibe dia ajak I couple balik. GILA TAK TERIMA?! Lepas clash, ada yang volunteer jadi pakwe tapi sume I reject sebab setia pada dia even kitorang dah takde any relationship though. Don't you ever forget, this will be the third time. So, I suruh dia tunggu I sampai habis PMR. I siap bagi permission pada dia kalau dia tak sanggup tunggu, he's free to find someone else. Tak lama, something 3 days, the guy that I've admired since masuk Medan masa Form 1, my best boyfriend, bukan pakwe tapi kawan lelaki yang paling rapat, my B pulak ajak couple. I reject sebab dah ada orang lain dulu yang dah meluahkan isi hati and willing to wait for me. Tapi I cakap atas sebab nak study for PMR, katanyaaa. Back to the story. Hubungan kitorang jadi mesra for this one month. He made my birthday the bestest day in my life. Dia bagi I music box, hadiah paling diidamkan sejak kecil. Dia betul-betul berubah, dah tak macam dulu. Everything was okay sampai minggu lepas, you can read about it here --->CLICK. Today, my bestf told me dia tak layan I seminggu tu sebab dia dah ajak my other friend yang boleh tahan baik dengan I jugak couple. WTH?! Rasa macam nak nangis tapi tahan. I jugak bagi permission, kan. Tapi ternangis jugak sebab result exam teruk. And now, buntuuu! Pity my B, kena reject mentah-mentah. My bestf thinks sangat-sangat tak adil I did this to my B, sedangkan si dia tu dah free flirting dengan someone else. And you rasa apa I rasa? I rasa bodoh sebab tak ikut naluri hati yang kuat pilih my B instead of that major loser just because dah terjanji dulu dengan mamat tu. He hurt my heart and feeling, thrice. My B, sorry. You gila caring kat I tapi I did this to you. Arghh, what a pathetic high-school love story.

To the jackass in this entry, Encik Awak kesayangan hati,
Thanks dah buat saya sedar saya tak layak berdampingan dengan awak. Saya tahu saya tak cantik, tak cun and tak sepadan dengan awak. Thanks dah bahagiakan saya even for a while. Hati saya dah hancur lebur, jadi debu, and I'll never forgive you after this. This is the last time I believe in you.

And to my B yang setia sampai sekarang KOT,
I'm sorryyyyy! I know I'm stupid for letting you go. You'll always be my best boyfriend I've ever had. Thanks for lending your shoulders for me to cry on. Thanks for lending your hand when I'm in a problem. Thanks for lending your heart to me, but I don't think I can have it. I'm sorry! :(

NO MORE LOVE AFTER THIS. PMR 2010, I LOVE YOU ONE AND ONLY.

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